The Suetonius Series: Caesars I & II

Before my trip to Italy a couple of years ago, I re-read The Twelve Caesars by Suetonius. Written . . . sometime between AD 119 and 140. That Suetonius! He cracks me up.

Now we begin the Suetonius series. Today we explore caesars I & II:

Julius Caesar

• His health was sound, "apart from sudden comas."
• He got lost on the way to the Rubicon.
• He was once captured by pirates who kept him prisoner for forty days, "much to his annoyance."

Augustus

• He was accused of softening the hair on his legs by singing them with red-hot walnut shells.
• He wore platform shoes.
• He had no patience for hair maintenance.
• His favorite metaphor for swift and sudden actions was "quicker than boiled asparagus."
• When he was a kid, just learning to talk, he told some frogs to stop croaking. No frog in that location ever croaked again.